Saturday, December 4, 2010

请你不要再说这个字

如题目所提,有些字,当你对别人说了后,有可能会伤害到别人的心
我有一个朋友,最近就常常向我用一个字:WHATEVER
可能我讲话比较直接,有时让人受不了
但每当我在她的言词中意会到她的不爽时,
我也尽力的解释与分析我所说的话,怕她误解我的原意,甚至有时还会祈求原谅
可是往往换回来的就是一句:WHATEVER
让我感觉很受伤, very hurt.
因为我感觉,WHATEVER = 随便你
意思=我不理你,I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU
如果朋友间,互不关心,互不理睬,那会变成怎样啊?
突然想起面子书上有人写过:
对不起是一种真诚,没关系是一种风度,
如果你付出了真诚,却得不到风度,那只能说明对方的无知与粗俗
我不期待对方会直接说没关系 (毕近我可能有一点点得罪别人的感受)
可是至少该慢慢谈,不要一下子就 WHATEVER嘛
那要让我如何接话呢?
这又让我想起面子书上所提过的字:哦
“哦”,是个敷衍的字眼,就是你懒得和对方说话时所说的话
而每当有人写这个字时,也会让对方不知道要如何接话。

我感觉人与人之间相处,一定会有摩擦,
所以要好好理解,互相容忍与原谅
凡事应该坦言相告,不要意有所指
不然每每讲话都好像会随时掀起骂战
那还有什么意思。
我本来是个很少会生气的人,可是这次真的有点被气到伤到
可能太过关心我这个好朋友的感受了吧
真希望以后我们再在网上谈天时,大家可以客客气气,既往不咎,无所不谈。
请不要再对我说 WHATEVER 啦! 

P/S: 我的那位朋友应该不大可能会看这篇文章,其实我只想发泄我所想说的,
各位部落客的朋友们,不好意思让你们看到我的负面情绪了。

9 comments:

Candlelyn said...

那位朋友是我吗?不是吧?呵呵呵~
当真心向一个人说话,却得到敷衍地对待,的确很伤人。
不过,有时候可能对方心情不太好,才会如此敷衍,你也不要太释怀,人总是有七情六欲,人的心是难以捉摸的。
如果真的伤到你的感受,就坦白、好好地向他说你的感受,好朋友相处最好不要互相猜疑。

ace C said...

也许无意的一句话会伤害到别人吧~尤其是最亲密的朋友,更是在意。希望你们的友情不会被这事情影响。=)

何书茜 said...

我认为你不必跟着他的心情走而搞得自己心情那么糟。他whatever时你也可以whatever的。你不为任何人活,所以不必浪费心思在不会珍惜的人的身上,自己过的开心最重要!

Eeleen said...

I also think that to reply someone "Whatever" is very rude.. I disliked it. =( But then, many times ppl don mean it when they say it. Still, we should try not to use it when answering people. =] I totally agree with you Lai Yee. =)

Jeannie said...

WHATEVER = 随便你
意思=我不理你,I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU

This is all your OWN interpretation.. Please do not put these words to people's mouth.. You should instead ask what happened or what do that person really mean.. Not just sit there and get angry all you want because he/she said that word.. He/She might not mean it that way.. Remember, interpretation is very subjective.. It might be different for everyone.. Just ask.. You are not going to lose anything..

No grudge.. Just explaining.. No labeling.. ==

FYI: I am saying this because she is talking about me and this is SO NOT what I meant..

P/s: Thank you LiLing for your kind understanding.. I had a rough day at work and my brain is dead when she's talking to me.. It was 12am+ that time.. ==

And by the way, the word "whatever" applies to many situation.. Not everything she says, I'll stop her with that word.. So please stop getting emotional for those who interpret this word like how she does.. A word is meant to be understand and not to be translated into another language.. It MIGHT be wrong or misinterpreted..

I bet someone will just return a "bomb" to me if he/she sees my reply.. Just use your brain (whenever you can use it) and stop being over emotional.. It will bring more harm than good.. Thank you..

Jeannie said...

Clarification, I mean over emotional brings more harm than good..

FYI: We're good now.. Because we talked to each other about it and she knows I did not mean it that way.. To anyone who wants to label me for being "rude", "disrespect" or equivalent, you are free to do so.. I have no rights to stop you from doing so..

Nobody is a SAINT, we are all humans.. Do not expect people to see things the way you see it.. Communication is the key.. Talk, discuss or anything~

I think I'm filling too much space in your comment space and I shall let you read about my thoughts..

skyofwishes said...

waseh, jeannie, your length of comment terkejut me oh. even longer than my post, haha.
yalah, when there are misunderstanding, we should talk to each other and discuss, not avoiding it. so now, both of us back to a good friends status, bcoz we willing to talk about the issue with each other.
my blog friends, no need to worry about us lah.
i also know maybe the word "whatever" not necessarily mean its way, but it still will make ppl don't know what to respond lah, and may cause misunderstanding too, so still better to avoid using it lah.
and ya, communication is the way to maintain a good relation. :)

p/s: jeannie, i think no one will come back to see this comment, except me, bcoz i set notification :) unless i ask some1 back here to see it lah. can see you really insomnia leh, around 4am also not yet sleep.

Jeannie said...

Told you I cannot sleep.. =P

My explanations can be lengthy if you don't mind.. Sorry~ Used to be a debater when I was in university.. Got used to explanations when people don't get me.. Somehow some people will thought I am arguing instead of clarifying things.. ==

I guess they take it too seriously? Or is it my face problem.. ==

skyofwishes said...

then, i prefer explanation then whatever loh. clarifying things is better than lazy to talk about it.
friend sure will take seriously what another friend said one lah.
what face problem, look too serious? haha.

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